Why is divorce and suicide a fatal brew for men? Why does divorce make men more suicidal than women? In fact, men in the United States are four times more likely than women to take their own lives.1)https://afsp.org/about-suicide/suicide-statistics/
The Shocking Divorce and Suicide Statistics for Men
Men commit suicide at a rate 3-4 times higher than women.2)The Canadian Mental Health Association Marital breakdown is often a factor. “Divorce is a tipping point for a lot of guys,” says Prof. John Oliffe, a University of B.C. psychology researcher. Professor Oliffe is part of a team fighting male depression and suicide. “Divorce is a classic factor in suicide because divorced men are at high risk to become isolated. There are so many examples of good men ending their own lives.”
North American divorced men are eight times more likely to commit suicide than women. Professor AJ Kposowa used data to analyze the effects of marital status on suicide risk3)Department of Sociology, University of California. He found that divorced men were more than twice as likely to commit suicide as married men. And divorced men are almost 10 times more likely to kill themselves than divorced women.4)http://vancouversun.com/news/staff-blogs/men-and-suicide-the-silent-epidemic
The Yearly Divorced Men Suicide Rate highlights the urgency of this Disaster
The Wrong Reasons assumed for Divorce and Suicide among Men
The Real Reasons Divorce and Suicide Affects Men more than Women
Table of Contents
- 1. The ‘Deadbeat Dad’ Label
- 2. Alienation and Estrangement from Children
- 3. Financial Ruin
- 4. Criminalization of a Law Abiding Citizen
- 5. Losing the Entire Structure of Family Life and Home
- 6. Being Declared Dangerous
- 7. Needing a Supervisor
- 8. Loss of Total Identity
- 9. Shock
- 10. The Loss of Reality
- 11. The Disgrace Kills, Not the Divorce
- 12. A Catastrophic Year or More
- 13. Loss of Love and Affection
- 14. No Support
- 15. Negative Side Effects of Antidepressants
- 16. No Future
- 17. From Dad to ‘Visitor’ Status
- What to do about Divorce and Suicide among men?
- Comments on Divorce and Suicide Risk for Men
1. The ‘Deadbeat Dad’ Label
Take action to protect yourself: Get the book 10 ways to avoid being a deadbeat dad.
2. Alienation and Estrangement from Children
3. Financial Ruin
4. Criminalization of a Law Abiding Citizen
5. Losing the Entire Structure of Family Life and Home
6. Being Declared Dangerous
Men are vulnerable to being treated as ‘dangerous’ or ‘depressed’ by the court or guardians of the court. A common tactic of the opposing divorce lawyer is to persuade the judge that the father is dangerous. Or depressed. Fear is a great persuader. If the judge believes there is a credible fear that the father is dangerous, he is going to lose his relationship with his kids.
All it takes is for the opposing side to accuse him of being dangerous. Even if the accusation is false, it is difficult to prove it false. Because it is now a he said / she said argument. And the judge will decide in favor of protecting the children from a falsely accused ‘dangerous’ father.
7. Needing a Supervisor
8. Loss of Total Identity
10. The Loss of Reality
11. The Disgrace Kills, Not the Divorce
12. A Catastrophic Year or More
13. Loss of Love and Affection
14. No Support
15. Negative Side Effects of Antidepressants
16. No Future
17. From Dad to ‘Visitor’ Status
What to do about Divorce and Suicide among men?
Make the Choice to Rebuild Your Vineyard, your Life –Make the decision right now to rebuild your life.
Select a Field that is Bright – we need bright thoughts and positive thoughts to rebuild.
Work the Field – Start strength training to exercise and work your physical body and your mind.
Seed the Field – Plant good thoughts, expectations and images of the future.
Water the Field – Eat real food daily, nourish your body and mind.
Growing the vineyard – Take care of yourself, adjust to any obstacles.
Harvest the vineyard – Be grateful for what you have right now.
Winnowing – Focus on the best and not the worst.
Pressing the wine – Get the most out of what you have right now, like squeezing the juice from the best grapes.
Drinking the Wine – we should appreciate as often as possible the gift of life, with our family and friends.
Terry: Why is estrangement so common in divorced families?Dr. Joshua Coleman: Divorce greatly increases the risk of estrangement. It often creates a fundamental reshaping of alliances and can place parents at risk for greater distance from their children. Whether it’s a grey divorce or a breakup when the child is young, it often causes a child to see parents as winners and losers.Second, it can create the opportunity for parental alienation where one parent consciously or unconsciously (covertly or overtly) poisons the child against the other parent. Children, especially when they are young, are very vulnerable after divorce.Next, divorce can also bring new people into a child’s life (new sibling, half sibling, step-parent) and they may feel they have to compete for love, attention, or resources. Finally, in our culture, divorce can cause a child to see their parent as an individual with their own attributes and liabilities—and less of a family unit that they’re part of.7)
Comments on Divorce and Suicide Risk for Men
References [ + ]
|2.||↑||The Canadian Mental Health Association|
|3.||↑||Department of Sociology, University of California|
|5.||↑||Kposowa AJ. Marital status and suicide in the National Longitudinal Mortality Study. Journal of Epidemiology and Community Health 2000; 54: 254-261.|