Understanding Women 101 is a subject that most men grapple with for most of their lives. Usually it is difficult to find a woman who is willing to share her perspective.
Today's guest post is by Lisa Kim who is a regular reader of Hashi Mashi and has pointed out that she wants to see something written to help the guys who are getting into better shape have a deeper insight into understanding women.
Lisa says that she has met plenty of men who do not have their act together when it comes to understanding women and even their six pack cannot save them from the chopping block.
Lisa offered to write an article on understanding women 101 as a guide for those who are perplexed when it comes to dealing with a woman. In this article, Lisa details the red flags she has experienced on a first date that result in zero second date.
So if understanding women is on your bucket list, then you have come to the right place.
Lisa wrote this post to help our male readers understand women.
Is she right in what she says about her expectations of a man?
Please share your thoughts, thank you.
Here is my initial Understanding Women 101 checklist for all you men out there who want to be successful in the dating arena.
Of course we all know that you are thinking sex, but you will still be dreaming of scoring if you cannot get down the basics.
Unfortunately, many men cannot, so as an act of random kindness, I made this Understanding Women 101 checklist for you so next time you have a date, just make sure that your date knows that she is dating a man and not a boy, and suddenly, the likelihood of your scoring will jump off the charts!
Understanding Women 101 Checklist
1. He does not smell.
2. He showered.
3. His hair is combed.
4. He uses cologne.
5. He does not bite his nails.
6. His fingers look well groomed.
7. His nails are not polished
8. He wears clean clothes.
9. He dresses appropriately for his age.
10. He wears clothing that fits.
11. He takes care of his teeth.
12. He does not have bad breath.
13. He is confident.
14. He does not fidget.
15. He does not play with his face or keep touching different parts of his body
16. He does not pick his nose.
17. He does not clear his throat a thousand times.
18. He does not snort mucus back into his nose.
19. He does not crack his knuckles.
20. He does not shake or rock back and forth.
21. He tells the truth about his age, height, marital status, job.
22. He is not creepy.
23. He has a sense of humor
24. I can tease him and he laughs it off.
25. I can and will test him and he passes my tests
Deeper Analysis of the Understanding Women 101 Checklist:
1. Well groomed – even if you are a weird person, first impressions count. you dont have to go so far as wearing a tux, but just be well groomed.
well groomed means
you do not smell
soap three times when you shower before your date
hair is combed
use a good cologne
if you are a nail biter, stop, and postpone the date until your fingers are healed.
If you cant postpone the date, use coconut oil liberally to hide your disgusting fingers that she will not want touching her, duh!
dress nicely
wear clean clothes
some real examples of men who did not follow these rules and read why they got rejected on the first date!
one time i came to meet a guy. he comes to meet me, he smiles and his teeth are bleeding! i was immediately disgusted and could not wait to leave. I could see visible plaque with blood and he was a professional, yet terrible at grooming. Rejected!
another time i met someone who had long nails that were not clipped at all and that was disgusting.
on the other hand i met someone who had no nails at all cause they were bitten down to the stub of the finger. Do you think that I wanted him touching me? No! Rejected!
I met a man who was wearing dirty clothes, for example his pants were stained from raking leaves.
do not wear a tie dyed shirt.
do not wear a t shirt.
dress appropriate for your age.
do not wear ripped clothing.
bottom line is to dress appropriately, wear clean clothing that FITS (so stop trying to hide your 40 inch belly in a 32 inch waist pants) and that is freshly laundered.
good grooming is so important because even if you are a bit weird or eccentric or a nerd, whatever it is, you are still going to build confidence in the woman that you are meeting.
You will make a great first impression and even if you do have some bad habits, you will have made enough of a good impression for her to want to stay longer on the first date.
If you make a really bad impression, she might want to bolt as soon as possible.
2. Personal hygiene – make sure that you brush your teeth regularly and go to the dentist, just brushing your teeth once in your life before every date is not going to help.
3. Nails and cuticles – as we mentioned above, absolutely make sure that if you have a bad nail biting habit, you better stop now. If you need help on how to stop biting your nails, no worries, we will write a separate post to deal specifically with how to stop biting your nails. It is a good idea for you to get a manicure but do NOT get your fingernails polished.
4. Habits –
Do not touch your face – why do women not like that? Because it looks as if you have no confidence. When you are touching your face and all over the place, you appear nervous and lacking self confidence.
Once I met a man, as we sat down he started to play with his face and I wondered what is up with him, why is he playing with his face so much. He was wiping sweat with his hand. Never do that. Make sure you have a handkerchief, that is why they were invented!
Do not pick your nose. That should be obvious.
Do not clear your throat. If you have to clear your throat, I do not mean to say that you should collapse from phlegm, but make sure that you get yourself outside and out of earshot of your date and then you can clear your throat like a gorilla and she will not be disgusted.
Do not snort all of your mucus back up into your nose or brains (if you have any).
Do not go to meet a woman if you have a cough or are sneezing.
Do I have to tell you not to go meet a woman if you have a cold? Probably, because I have met men who snorted and were obviously fighting a cold and it was not pleasant.
Do not show any abnormal habits like fidgeting, shaking or cracking your knuckles.
Do I have to tell you not to crack your knuckles on your face? Yes, believe it or not I met a guy who cracked his knuckles on his face using his cheekbone, he looked like he was out of his mind cracking his knuckles every five minutes on his face. So, do not do it, and if you have a specific unknown disorder for cracking your knuckles on hard surfaces, when she is not looking, find a counter top or wall and crack your knuckles there, but not in front of her.
5. Tell the Truth – One time a guy asked me where I was from and I told him that I am from south korea. So he immediately says that he knows someone from there and I did not believe it so I asked him what is the name of his south korean friend? He made up a bogus name that was clearly not from south korea and was probably from north dakota and after that I did not want to hear anything else that he had to say.
Do not lie about your height – One time I met a guy who said that he was 5 feet 6 inches. I myself am 5 foot 2 inches and he was shorter than me, duh!
Did he really think that I would not notice that he is shorter than me?
Do not lie about your age because we can tell.
Do not lie about your job.
Do not lie about your weight.
Do NOT lie and say that you are DIVORCED when you are NOT divorced. Get it? This means that if you are separated, do not tell me that you are ONLY SEPARATED, sorry, I do not want to meet a man who is still married.
One time I met a man who had in his profile that he was divorced, and when we met, he told me that he had never been married. Very suspicious. If he did not care about what he wrote on his own profile, why should I bother to spend my time to meet him?
6. Don't be creepy
7. Have a sense of humor
8. Laugh it off if you are teased
9. I am going to test you, so do n0t get spooked at my tests
10. Do not be cheap – one time I had met a guy who wanted to split a bill of $14, I was just upset by this because if he must split a $14 check, it made me feel very vulnerable that this guy cannot be a provider at all. I just paid the entire bill myself and got out of there fast.
One time I met a man in a deli and we stood up to get coffee, he was in front of me and did not even offer to pay for me. That shows me lack of confidence. Be confident enough to pay for me as well.
To Be Continued…
Rich is a certified personal trainer-AAPT and the author of 